The past few months have been… quite a ride.
The pandemic has resulted in taking over 3 million lives. Not to mention people are losing jobs, businesses, education, and housing as well. These losses induced the feeling of grief. Thankfully, the numbers are declining as of now. However, for those of us who lost someone or something in the past few months, how are you feeling right now?
Grief is a complicated emotion to understand. It impacts our ability to make decisions, process information, and regulate our emotions. It needs patience and compassion and a whole process to unfold. Sadly, the pandemic has limited the way for humans to process death and grieving. People are not allowed to attend funerals anymore. Everything needs to be done virtually, saying goodbye to your loved ones is not exempted.
Although it may feel unfair, the limitations are necessary to slow the spread of Covid-19. Meanwhile, here are some actions you can take to help you cope with feelings of grief in the current situation:
1. Take one day at a time
Nothing is easy about losing someone you loved or being cut off from a job. It’s normal to feel numb, angry, sad, and even question whether the loss really happened. There’s no such thing as the right or wrong way to grieve. Koebler-Ross stated that grieving is as individual as we are and is not a linear process.
You are allowed to grief for as long as you need to. Although reality often treats grief as a fleeting moment in time, don’t let anyone – including yourself – tell you when to get over it. Let yourself feel angry, to cry, not cry, or laugh.
Take your time. Acknowledge your loss and your feelings of grief. Focus on aspects of your life that you have control over currently and be gentle with yourself.
2. Connect with other people
There will be times when depending on yourself alone becomes confining. Trying to hid grief only leads to prolonging it. Having a safe space where you can allow your emotions to surface and express them would help with the emotional healing process.
Arrange conference calls with your family members and friends to share some stories or pictures. Coordinated date and a time for family and friends to honor your loved one. Find a community that is living the same situation as you currently. It’s important to have at least a pair of sympathetic ears and not feel lonely at times like this.
3. Ask for help
Not all of us are lucky to have a deep understanding of how to deal with grief. Sometimes we push the grief away or distract ourselves by doing other activities or tasks. Unresolved grief can lead to more serious problems such as depression, anxiety, and other health problems. If left untreated, it could lead to even bigger problems. It’s important to know your limits and when to seek out professional help.
The pandemic has caused more unexpected losses than ever before. No one expects anyone to take it easy at such uneasy times like this. There are no quick fixes to grief; no easy way out. Not even a deadline. When it happens to you, let yourself go through it. Develop empathy for yourself and be present with no judgment.
Words by: Aldhanti Bodhihanna
References: wired.com, CDC, WHO
Image credit: Pinterest